On Sunday, my ex-wife Lupa and I did our hand-parting. We've ended the marriage in a very amicable way and are still friends. In fact, we both recognize that we make great friends, but lousy spouses. Since the hand-parting happened, I've noticed a definite shift in my sense of identity, as well as on an energetic level. In my chest, when we did the hand-parting, I felt a loosening up of energy, a final uncoiling of everything that had previously held us together.
Since then I've felt a wide range of emotions. There's some lingering sadness, and also a lot of relief. There's a lot I learned in this marriage, in the life we shared together, and a lot I take away in recognition of that. The biggest lesson I've learned is to be honest with myself as completely as possible, especially if I hope to have a good relationship with someone else. That applies to friendships as much as any other kind of relationship, but it was in my marriage to Lupa that I really learned this lesson...and she expressed similar sentiments at the hand-parting, which tells me I was in good company through this.
Seriously though...For what this relationship with her was, it was what I needed, when I needed it. I wish Lupa the best in her life and I'm glad we're still friends.