Self-Evocation 2011

Here's my latest painting. It's a self-Evocation painting. I do these occasionally and I use them to paint an internal landscape of my consciousness. This one is actually quite nice and feels much more peaceful compared to some of the other ones.

A self-evocation is really a snapshot of time, a way to connect with a particular moment of my life. I've used the paintings occasionally to interact with younger versions of myself. In a sense the paintings act as a temporal powerspot. It's not the only method I use for accessing past versions of myself, but it is a useful method to use, and one that provides something to focus on to help you reach that past point of existence.

Archetypal actions

I've been watching Nikita lately, which is the newest rendition of La Femme Nikita. In one of the episodes, the actress playing Nikita does the famous action of diving into the laundry chute to avoid being incinerated by the missile. You know the action I'm talking about. It's the action that occurred in both movies and likely occurred in the other La Femme Nikita series as well. It's what I call an archetypal action, an action that defines and embodies the archetype or character. It makes you think of all the iterations of that character. It brings that character to life for you.

If you're an actor, or a magician doing that action can also make for an effective invocation, though I'd recommend against diving down chutes to avoid being incinerated. My point being however that if you look at pop culture and mythology in general you will likely find specific actions or activities that a given character, god, etc did and those actions are part of the archetypal consciousness of that being. You may even find that there are actions that repeat across different cultures, with the result being that the action taps into something deeper than the faces that happen to display the action. You tap into the essence of the archetype, something faceless, that nonetheless represents what it is you want access to. An archetype isn't just the face, after all...it's the actions that embody the concept.

Part of my work with identity has involved using space and movement to shift identity. Archetypal actions can be a part of that work, particularly when you want to invoke a spirit by embodying it. Actions allow the spirit to take over, to possess and become part of your experience even as you enter into its experience. I've done such actions in my work with Elephant and Dragon for example, but also with various characters I've worked with. By mimicking the movements and actions, a person invites a different body awareness, and can use that awareness to call to the entity of choice that s/he wants to work with.

A Yule Ritual

The other night, for our Magical Experiments meeting, we decided to do a Yule Feast and Ritual. The Feast was Roast Beef, Mashed Potatoes, carrots, beans, garlic bread and spiced wine and cider. It was an excellent way to celebrate the solstice, with good friends. But it was also a magical act, in and of itself, celebrating each other's fortune and also promoting that prosperity for the next year. The ritual was a simple, but focused working. We were first given papyrus reed and a pen. On the paper we wrote down or drew a symbol of something we wanted to get rid or banish from our lives. We had the option of telling others what we were getting rid of and then we lit it on fire and focused our intention on banishing it from our lives.

Afterwards we were each given a candle and on the candle we wrote or carved a symbol that represented what we wanted to bring into the new year. We burned the candles for a bit, but then snuffed them. I have mine on my desk and I will light it again on the first of the year.

Tonight we're buying the ashes, so that what was banished is recycled to the Earth.

Elemental Balancing Ritual Fire Month 2

11-27-11 Something which has always frightened me has been my own fire. It's frightened me, in part because of the various people in my life who at one time or another told me I was too passionate, too intense, or just plain too much. I've gotten so used to pushing that intensity down or directing it other places because no one wanted to handle it. But it wasn't just the intensity. It's also been the anger. Fire embodied anger for me for a long time, and I've never been comfortable with anger, from myself or anyone else. As I was meditating today Dragon pointed out that fire didn't have to be any of these things. That the only one who'd perceived it that way had been me, but also I didn't have to continue perceiving myself in a particular way either. That's something I've been discovering in my relationship with Kat, and also discovering that I am not too much for myself or someone else.

I've always been driven by my passion. That can be good or it can be bad. Just depends on what you make of it, but I'm not going to bank the fire of my life or my relationship with fire because of an ill conceived perception. If I hold onto it, I empower it...and if I let it go, I open myself to new possibilities.

12-2-11 The meditations have focused on anger this week. Dragon had me do a history of anger, both in terms of how I've seen anger expressed and how I've expressed it. When I look at the history of anger, I start with my Dad. With him, anger was always a volcanic eruption. It would build and build up and then one day explode. His anger was always fast and hard, and you never knew what would set him off. Both my step-mom and mom tended to be more passive aggressive in certain ways, though my step mom would also be overly aggressive. She encouraged it in her daughter as well, who learned early on that she could take her anger out on me with no repercussions. What I learned early on was that I had to repress my anger. I wasn't allowed to show it, and if I did show it, I got disciplined.

Even later on I had experiences where for the most part other people expressed anger, while I kept a lid on it, except for the rare occasions when it'd pop out in a volcano. Consequently my own relationship with my feeling of anger is an uncomfortable one. Even with the internal work I've done, I still feel afraid of my own anger. I've recently been working on expressing it, and listening to it, instead of repressing it and this seems to help, but learning to listen to an emotion you've normally repressed isn't very easy. Listening to my anger means letting myself be vulnerable to feelings of hurt as well. It's not that I'm not aware of those feelings, and that I even feel them, but feeling them in conscious conjunction with anger is a whole another experience.

12-5-11 In today's meditation, Dragon pointed out that anger, for me, seemed to really be about control. specifically not feeling control and wanting control. I think that's true for me. When I look at the situations in my life a common theme is not feeling like I had control...feeling like I was under someone else's thumb. And the anger I feel is an anger of not feeling acknowledged. It's an anger that I haven't let go, because I'm trying to cling on to some kind of acknowledgement of the hurt I've felt. Yet that anger doesn't give me that acknowledgement. It just ends up being something I stew in.

I've come to realize as well that I'll likely not get the acknowledgement I want from the people who've hurt me. and Maybe even if they did, it wouldn't be enough. It all comes back to holding on to this anger, to this hurt that I've felt. Dragon asked me what it would be like to actually let go of that anger, to actually release it, instead of holding onto it and letting it define my identity. I don't want that anger to identify my identity, but I know why I've held onto it so much. For so long, going back to my childhood, holding onto that anger was what got me through difficult situations. They couldn't take my anger from me, and I could use it to prove they were wrong. That kind of motivation was what kept me going through a lot of hard times. But holding onto it now doesn't really help. I'm not happy holding on to it. I need to learn to let go.

12-7-11 I allowed myself to articulate my anger, and the underlying feeling of rejection that seems to accompany that anger. It's not anger toward just one person, but a lifetime of people, who in one way or another showed me that I wasn't a high or important priority in their lives. Being able to articulate that to Kat, to share that pain and anger helped. The realizations I've been having about my anger and the underlying emotional bedrock that supports it shows me how important it is that I finally feel like I am an actual priority to someone. There's a sense of relief and disbelief.

12-8-11 I always find it fascinating how the experiences in my life fit neatly into the theme I'm working on. Today at my small Business Management class, the instructor brought up the value of changing your stories. He said the stories we tell ourselves set up the scripts and situations we find ourselves in. I certainly know this, but hearing it again today caused me to experience it a different way and apply this idea of rewriting old stories into new ones to some of the stories I have been telling myself as I've been working with my anger this month. For example, telling myself a new story of: I am loved, wanted, desired, needed, appreciated, and supported in what I do, and how I choose to do it is a powerful change for me. I hadn't, until recently, ever really felt supported. Now I do.

12-17-11 Owning my anger, acknowledging and taking responsibility, but also choosing to know I can feel anger. I've been thinking about that all week, and how I can own my anger to empower myself. Owning anger isn't pushing it down. Owning anger, for me, is learning to let go, instead of holding on so tight. I don't need it to define my identity anymore.

Desire has been coming up a lot as well, which makes sense, given how much fire is associated with desire. I've explored desire in other elements, but fire brings its own perspective on desire. Desire has such twists in it. to be desired and to desire. Am I desired for one aspect, or is the desire for the real me?

12-18-11 Sometimes the person I'm the angriest with is myself. I've always found it hard to forgive myself for what I consider mistakes. My first marriage is an example of that. I'm angry at myself for staying so long in what was clearly an unhealthy relationship for myself and the ex. The choices I made in that relationship are ones I've looked over and questioned, because they were symptomatic of the underlying unhappiness. I'm responsible for staying in that relationship for so long. Still hindsight is 20 20 and as I've continued the internal work around that relationship and the choices I made in it, I have to acknowledge that where I am now is not where I was then. I can look back and judge myself or I can look back and see a very fallible person who made very real mistakes and has since learned from those mistakes. I don't feel the anger often toward myself anymore, but occasionally it still comes up, and tells me I still have healing and forgiveness to do.

12-21-11 The other day Kat and I were having a conversation and she said, "I know you're angry with me. Let me in." It took a while, but eventually I told her what I was feeling angry about. It was interesting for me, because even though I knew I felt angry, being so honest about it involved being so vulnerable as well. It was hard to be so vulnerable, but it was also so freeing to tell her how I really felt. So often I've held my anger in, until finally its erupted...how much better to simply admit it, and be open about it. As this month ends, I feel more comfortable with my anger, and with what the work with element fire has revealed about it. That's what the elemental balance work is all about.

Spatial Dynamics and Magic

Space is one of those elements that continues to fascinate me, especially when I look at how people use space to situate and express their own identity. I came to this perspective through the anthropological of Edward T. Hall and Alexander Laban's perspectives on space and movement. The occupation of space whether with objects or with politics or spirituality. The application of space in a person's sense of identity via home, work, car, etc. Now apply this to magic. Magic is about changing a space. It changes a space by turning possibility into reality. Space changes, becomes a different space when a possibility is brought into reality. Space is changed by time, with the understanding that time is what brings possibility into reality, while space provides the necessary anchor for reality to exist in.

A person is his/her own space. Space acts on space and in turn is acted on by space. The person expresses his/her space in the external space, but that same space also shapes the person's identity. When a person performs an act of magic s/her is inviting in both time, and specific defined spaces to modify the current space s/he inhabits, both in terms of identity, and in terms of circumstances the person is in.

Fear and Magic

I read a post where the writer argued that if you weren't feeling fear in your magical practice, you either aren't human, or you are trying hard to stay in your safety zone. I get the point of this post, and to some degree I agree with it. Feeling some fear as you break your boundaries and challenge your identity is a good thing. It means you're doing the hard work. Challenging yourself to move forward when you feel fear is a necessary part of life in general. When I practice magic though, I don't feel fear. I feel empowerment. I feel excited, alive, vibrant. Magic is life, magic is power, magic is turning the impossible into reality. When I feel fear, I feel it in the moments when I do internal work, and I face within myself those weaknesses and issues and hurts and pains. That's when I feel fear. That's why I do my internal work...to reach a place of understanding and resolution with those fears so that when I practice my magical work, there is resolve and knowing that what I do aligns to my identity.

We all approach magical work differently. When I work with the elementals and spirits I approach them as friends, as companions. Other people do not. I think how you approach such beings sets the tone for the type of interaction you'll have with them. Thus to approach them as friends, to approach them with confidence is my own way of knowing them. It works because it's something I feel confident in. It works because I know my place in relationship to their own.

Fear is a funny emotion. It can paralyze a person, motivate a person...it can block and push. I find that knowing where to encounter fear changes your magical practice. Encountering it in my internal work and making it an active part of that work has changed the external work and the need to do the external work, and changed my life...its much quieter now than it was before.

A new Year, A new you

I saw this blog entry on Twitter and was intrigued by what the person had to say  about reinventing herself. It reminds me a bit of the elemental balancing ritual I do each year. I'm in the 2nd month of my new year, and in a sense the new person I'm discovering as I work with the element of fire. But it also made me think about the fact that I'm in the process of reinventing two of my businesses. I'm reinventing Magical Experiments, slowly but surely, both in terms of offering correspondence courses (I'm working on the magical process course currently) and in terms of branding. But with Imagine Your Reality, I'm reinventing the entire business. I've just gotten the social media piece nailed down, and I'm finally turning toward the business coaching part and redoing my entire business plan. It's a reinvention of identity, both for myself, but also for people I want to market my services too.  It's an ongoing challenge, because I'm not just writing a new business plan, I'm also doing a fair amount of internal work. For example at our class, we were challenged to rewrite our internal stories into more positive ones. What does it have to do with business? Quite a lot actually, because the internal reality you believe is the reality that manifests in your life.

Each year, the elemental balancing ritual is part of my reinvention. The thematic approach provides enough structure to make consistent changes, while providing enough freedom to allow yourself to experience the lessons needed to make those changes happen. A necessary part of that process involves keeping a journal of sorts, which is why I blog on this journal about the experiences each month. The only exception has been a two year gap, wherein I focused on Magical Identity. You won't necessarily find such personal entries in it, but it nonetheless encapsulates the experiences of two years of reinvention.

Change is a constant. Embracing change within your magical practice is how you take control of the change you experience and make it part of your identity.

An infinity of possibilities

Multi-angled eyesstare into an infinity of possibilities absorbed in the flow of time acting on space unrealized possibilities folding into realities not are own as well fall into shimmering waves of existential bliss The angles of the angels reveals place, purpose, function, What are they but what they identify with? The angles of the demons reveals place, purpose, function The angles of the gods reveals place, purpose, function And what do you reveal child of light and shadow? You represent possibilities outside such fixed identities laughing chaos that reveals there's so much more than just form, function, place, or purpose I cannot be more than what I am is only reserved for those beings that have chosen that their function, form, place, and purpose have more importance than the opportunity to change and grow. You are that you are, I am that I am, the Breath of the universe ripples through your life and you reveal in that moment the glory of your multi-angled eyes... You'll pick and choose and turn possibilities into realities and we'll dance in those realities even as we look into the infinity of all things and none.

Tarot Readings and spontaneous spreads

 

I was doing dual deck tarot readings at the local yule fair last week and what stood out to me was how people would create their own spreads, which didn't necessarily look like anything I'd create, but nonetheless made perfect sense for those people. What I liked about that realization is that it proves that fixed spreads are not a necessary part of Tarot reading. In fact, I'd argue that the spontaneous creation of new spreads made the reading more effective because the layout of the cards demonstrated the mental "space" of the person, and how the different cards were situated in that space.

Space, mental and physical, is part of how a person defines his/her identity. The manipulation of space via placement of objects is part of that identification process and it can tell a lot about what obstacles a person is encountered. A spread that is chaotic with elements all over the place still has an order to it, even if its an order that only the person who created the spread understands. A reading I recently did initially looked very chaotic. It took asking some questions to really get to the central issue, but once those questions were asked the spread made complete sense and fit the issue rather well.

What makes this approach dynamic however is that if you use a tarot reading as an act of enchantment, you can make the person's ability to change the spread, to reorganize it an essential part of the reading. In other words, the person changes the spatial identity s/he inhabits by changing how the cards are spatially organized, as well as how s/he understands the underlying message of the card. The result is a different reading, one that plots how the person will make changes to the existing pattern in order to resolve whatever issues are represented.

Here's a podcast episode where I talk about some of my initial experiments with Tarot.

An update on My New Book, Magical Identity

 

Here's a picture of the cover, done by Kat Lunoe. Doesn't it look great? Magical Identity is currently being edited. I had to switch editors, which pushed the book release date back to March of 2012. However I'm not presenting at Pantheacon this year, so it actually works out that the book will be out a bit later. It gives me time to finish revisions and add in some more content that I've developed since I finished the first draft.

I'm reading the very last book I need to read for research. I've actually taken a little break from it, because I've spent the last couple months reading books I'd found out about that could be relevant to the book. All that reading reminds me of graduate school, where I'd literally spend up to 12 hours reading (they'd have preferred 16 but I believed in having fun time...it's not an approved academic activity however).

I'm really excited about almost having this book done. I'll be doing radio interviews soon about it and just knowing that finally, after so many years I've got another book on magic coming out...That has me pumped.It might be the last book for a little while as well. I have ideas for other books, but I'm very much at a pre-research phase with those books. However, I think Magical Identity will be my best book yet, especially because it deals with themes of space and time as well as neuroscience.

Change starts from within

"Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing themselves" Leo Tolstoy When I think about Western Magic, and one of my problems, this statement from Tolstoy sums it up nicely. In late teens and early to mid twenties, I remember being that person who wanted to change the world, but didn't think of changing himself. That's not surprising because within western magic there is no overt forms of internal work provided, beyond perhaps some pathworking exercises. I had to go to Eastern systems such as Taoism to really discover in-depth meditation techniques. Since learning those techniques and implementing them into my daily practice, I've found that there is much less of an overt need to change the world. In fact, usually where the change needs to start is from within.

Magical techniques such as sigils or evocation aren't focused on internal work. There's nothing wrong with that, but it is worth the magician's time to actually apply some degree of introspection in order to look at the underlying motivations behind doing the work. Such internal work can help clarify the motivations and even ensure that the working will be successful by removing any internal resistance toward it.

Internal work is an essential part of magical practice. When I take magical students on, we spend a fair amount of time initially exploring what their values and beliefs are, how they define themselves and their place in the world, as well as teaching them meditation techniques. I've found that this initial work is crucial because it helps them remove a lot of internal obstacles and most importantly helps them understand how to effectively use magic to make changes in the world around them. Practitioners who actively use internal work will also cut down on the need to do more overt acts of magic...and not surprisingly will also lower the overall level of drama and chaos as they work out their issues. Instead of having such issues come up in their lives, the practitioners are able to identify  the triggers and make changes to their behaviors. The result is a better life and more clarity about what they want and need to live such a life.

Magic on The Edge 2.0 call for Papers

Magic on the Edge 2.0 is an anthology of experimental occultism, testing the cutting edges of magical practice to reveal intriguing experiments and new ideas, to push the future of magical practice forward and provide further inspiration for other practitioners. It is edited by Taylor Ellwood, the managing non-fiction editor of Immanion Press. It is a sequel to Magick on the Edge, which was published in 2006 by Immanion Press We are looking for articles 3k to 6k words in length on topics that can include the following:

• Innovative explorations of magical traditions
• Experimental techniques with contemporary disciplines such as space/time magic, internal alchemy, laboratory alchemy, ceremonial magic, neoshamanism, etc.,
• Creative meditation practices
• Unconventional approaches to ceremonial magic and other traditional practices of magic
• The blending of art or science with magic.
• Each article needs to include a practical exercise for readers
• Got an idea? Run it by me and I'll give you feedback (see contact info below).

The deadline for articles has been pushed back to October 15th. We are looking to publish this anthology in 2013.

For more information or questions contact Taylor

Changing your Identity by Shifting your Balance

Every year I do an elemental balancing ritual. The purpose of this ritual is to create balance in my life by working on aspects of myself that need to be balanced. Really what I'm doing it changing my overall identity by shifting the balance using an intensive working to generate a specific direction for my internal work. I think its worked well to help me make conscious changes to who I am in a positive manner. Internal work isn't something that can be done in one moment. It takes dedication and focus. I figure that by shifting my balance using elemental energy each year, I can actually put dedicated time into internal work that focuses on particular themes I need to work on. I put a year's time into each elemental theme and a years work does provide enough time to make substantive changes to a person's identity. It's not easy work, but it is work that makes your life easier.

Shifting your identity, your state of being, if you will, necessarily changes the relationships that you are in. I've had friendships fall away, a marriage end, and and started new relationships in large part because of the elemental balance work I've done. Shifting your identity also shifts the connections you have with people. You have to decide if that is worth it. I think it is worth it, because even though some relationships have changed, what has changed even more, on a fundamental level is my relationship with myself and how I live in the world. And I find the changes to be satisfying. I like who I am as a result of doing the work.

I've always said that you can't please everyone and I mention that because when you engage in internal work you necessarily have to accept that the changes you make won't please everyone. That's part of the price of doing internal work. You confront who you are, you make changes to your identity and those changes manifest in how you interact with the world.

Changing your balance changes your place in the universe and your awareness of that place. You start asking hard questions of yourself and others and you look at what you can change and you make those changes because you want to shift your balance, want to shift to a new place. That's what internal work does. It spurs you on, pushes you to make changes, demands the best from you, refines you alchemically, and when you do all of that the result is a changed person, someone different from before. And everything that doesn't fit, falls away.

Book Review: On Desire (Affiliate Link) by William Irvine

On Desire is a fascinating book that looks at how we interact with desire. The author comes off as a little prudish, advocating more of an approach of ignoring desires, but even with that tone, the book provides a look at what desire is, what the neurological basis of it is, as well as how different cultures and communities deal with desire. I would have liked to have seen exercises in this book from the author. It is more of a philosophical treatise than anything else, but still worth a read.

Elemental Fire Month 1

10-22-2011 I've been staying very mindful of the element of fire in my life. I attended a divination party tonight, where you could offer readings or get readings. I did five readings for different people and told them about the magical experimenters meeting. And while doing their readings, while talking with them, I had a sense of seeking, a sense of fire as seeking, discovering, but also a sense of fire as a qualifier. Intuitively I knew that the people that needed the invitation would follow up on it because it was the right invitation for them and they'd fit the group as well. 10-25-2011 The last few days has involved a dialogue between Dragon and myself about Fire, passion, and consumption. What stands out most is the focus on fire as a metaphor for passion and why that's not such a good thing. Dragon points out that fire ultimately consumes, and if passion is fire, than its more about consumption than anything else. If fire is a metaphor for passion, there can be danger in that metaphor, in terms of how people approach passion. And I think he's right. My experiences with passion, in part, has been more about trying to experience a sensation that I might think of as fire, but in the process I've gotten burned a lot, because it's not something which is sustainable. Dragon pointed out that fires eventually consume themselves, until there's nothing left to give...Some interesting thoughts come to mind about American Culture and its focus on consumption. What does that teach us, about ourselves, others etc? Is it all something to be consumed, or can we really experience it?

10-31-2011 Fire just is. The association of doing and activity is meaning attributed to fire, but dragon asked me what it would be like to just contemplate fire as it is, instead of contemplating fire as doing something.

11-07-11 Dragon brought up something that really grabbed my attention. He said what a person fixates on or desires or obsesses over can burn him/her and the people in his/her life, because f how it consumes them. But if a person can consume and let go of what s/he desires, then it no longer takes up his/her energy in quite the same way. Now this is nothing new...you find this advice in meditation, but looking at it from the perspective of fire, and consuming something so it turns to smoke and then is wafted away...that's what grabbed my attention. And I have to admit that I'm in this process of consuming instead of being consumed. Not an easy process, but it is freeing up a lot of energy.

11-16-11 I haven't been as good about updating this entry as I'd like, but a lot's happened. Kat and I noticed that the stray black cat that lives near our house had kittens. It's getting really cold out, and this summer we'd actually found a dead kitten. It was pretty upsetting. So we decided to catch the mama cat (to neuter it) and catch the kittens as well. We managed to catch two of the kittens. The other one is gone, may be dead or alive, and the mama cat hasn't shown up lately. I took the trap back today, but I'll deploy it if she comes back. What does all this have to do with fire?

Dragon brought up a very important point. When you create a spark, you are responsible for nurturing it and using it wisely. When I think about the mama cat, I remember that my ex-wife chose to feed her. I don't know if it would've stuck around anyway, but I do know that feeding it encouraged it to stay in the neighborhood. I realized that I should've tried to catch that mama cat much earlier than now. More importantly, in catching these two kittens I felt that I had chosen to take on the responsibility of doing something with them. The animal control shelter told me if they weren't tame enough, they'd be euthanized, and that they might be euthanized anyway because of how many cats they have. There's no way I'd let two cats be euthanized simply because they'd been caught. I've learned about another place, the Cat Adoption Team, where they don't euthanize cats, but we have had these kittens for a week and we've all gotten attached to them. They seem to feel the same. And the point here is this: You always have a responsibility to see through what you take on. I've taken on those two kittens. They're part of my responsibility, that spark of life I've nurtured by capturing them and taming them.

11-18-2011 Sometimes I wonder if I've left my passion for all things occult somewhere else. Actually I sometimes wonder if I've left my passion for lots of things somewhere else. And I guess that's a reason I'm doing this work with the element of fire. I want to get in touch with that passion, and yet ironically I think I am in touch with that passion...it's just a slow process of rekindling it. I let it get banked by personal circumstances, by my choices to try and make myself into something I wasn't. Never again. Never again will I give my fire, my passion, my intensity away or push it down. That kind of give away can hurt you so much and it hurts your creativity as much as it hurts in other ways. I feel like my creativity is finally coming back because my passion has a safe place to be.

11-21-11 There is nothing worse than feeling that you failed yourself or someone else. And yet failure prompts growth and change. It forces you to reassess what's truly important and then claim that importance through the actions you take to bring change to your life. The ashes of defeat are also the loam that prompts growth. What you hold dearest can fall away in a moment and yet when it falls away it reveals who you are through how you respond. Do you rail against it? Do you accept it and learn from it? Do you burn yourself or do you warm yourself? It's a fine balance to walk. I choose to cultivate a warm fire instead of a vengeful fire. Where that takes me as a result is hopefully to a better place in my healing as well as in my passion.

How to learn process and apply it to magic

I talk about the process of magic a lot on here, but a question that might arise is: What exactly is process and how do I learn it? Or more specifically, How do I turn magic into a process? I learned about process from two different disciplines: Academia and Technical Writing. Both disciplines are process oriented, albeit in different ways. In academia, the process is research oriented. If you have an angle you want to explore, you need to do a lot of research and find corresponding evidence that supports your claim, and protects it from potential attacks by other people. This approach to process is more theory oriented than anything else, but it taught me a lot about how to construct an argument, and develop a defense for that argument. It also taught me to appreciate research and the need to ground any work you do in what others have already laid out. To this day, my approach to magic is always based in ongoing research into various subjects that are relevant to the experiments I'm working on. At the same time, academia also taught me the dangers of being too focused on theory. Within the particular disciplines I studied there was very little application, which caused me to question what, if anything, was really being done with the research academics were conducting. I recognized that while research is a necessary and integral part of a process, it must be balanced by something else.

Technical writing was the other discipline that taught me about process. It likely helped that my first tech writing job was at Boeing, where one of the phrases is: "Process is king" In that position, I learned that good technical writing had to address the right audience, while providing step by step practical explanations of how to use a given technology. Research also still played a role, but the practical application was the most important part. If you couldn't apply it, it didn't matter. That made sense to me and I realized it was the missing piece that academia didn't have. If you can't apply it, it doesn't matter. Or in occult terms, if you can't apply it, you're just an armchair magician.

That's how I learned process, but I doubt most people really want to follow my exact footsteps. But the two lessons you can take from those steps are: Anything you do must be grounded in research in order to show others where its come from and If you can't practically apply what you are working on to improving your life, it doesn't matter.

So figure out what you need to research and determine if you can apply it to your life. But there's another lesson I learned from technical writing as well, that can help you develop a process. Everything you do can be broken down into steps.

Once you break something into steps you have a rudimentary process. Apply lessons one and two as well and you have a full fledged process. And lets not forget you also need to measure results. If you have a process, you have a result and you need to measure that result to determine if your process works. A process is only effective if you can consistently achieve the result you've designed the process for.

What makes effective experimentation in magic

When I think about effective experimentation in magic, I think that its essential to have a group of people who are willing to test your experiment. These people don't even need to know each other, but they need to be people who are willing  to give your experiment a try and provide honest feedback. Anyone can come up with an idea, and an idea can even be developed into a process that the person extensively works on and fine tunes. But until that person has shared the the process with other people, so that they can test it, its fair to say it's not an effective experiment. Effective experimentation calls for feedback and input from other people that aren't familiar with the technique and are willing to test it with the appropriate balance of skepticism and open mindedness that is needed for effective experimentation. As an example, when I experimented with a technique to contact neurotransmitters, I knew that to truly test its effectiveness, I needed to find other people who could verify if the technique worked. I ended up having a variety of people experiment with the technique. Some were from the U.K. and some were from the states, so they didn't all know each other. The consistent results that they achieved was what verified the technique and made an effective experiment.

You also need to be able to explain how your process works, so that other people can duplicate it. If a reader just gets lots of vague theories about how it works, but there isn't any practical instructions then what you have is more of an armchair approach to magic. Sounds great in theory, but can I implement it?

Perhaps what is most vital to effective experimentation is curiosity. You have to be curious and open to exploring what's around you. My curiosity is what has motivated my exploration of magic. I've always wanted to know what the real limits of magic are, as well as what my limits are. So if I can test something out, I will, in order to see what I can do, but then I'll bring it to other people and ask them to test it, to see what they can do. Naturally the people I look for are curious as well.

Effective experimentation is about developing a consistent process that can be done again and again and again, with the achievement of consistent results. Its as simple as that, and yet that simplicity demands careful attention to detail, to ensure your process does work.

Art and Magic

I posted an updated on different social networks asking people how they got creative with their magical work. I got a couple of interesting responses including one about a coven that uses arts and crafts in their rituals and it got me to thinking about my own artistic approach to magic. I've always been in favor of taking a creative approach to magic and while some of that creativity has focused on blending pop culture into magic or applying principles from other disciplines to magical work, its also focused on using art in the magical work as well. One of my favorite mediums to work in is body paint. The body becomes a canvas, which is painted with body paints that can be used to express and explore the magical work in context to the body.

Collage is another medium I've always enjoyed. Cutting away the meaning from text and picture and then reassembling it into my own image has always appealed, because it gives a person an opportunity to create something that runs counter to the messages that were previously imbedded in the media.

Painting with water color is another medium I've liked using. I tend toward abstract paintings, and there's something fun about letting go of any shape and just painting, but I think you can have a specific concept in mind and still make it magical.

Singing, whistling, and lately playing with my harmonica has been another creative activity I've applied to my magical work. I'm doing some experimentation with Tuvan throat singing as well. I think exploring what your voice can do or what a musical instrument can do in terms of magical work can be a lot of fun. Certainly listening to some of the musicians I enjoy has taken me to some novel spaces with their intentional blending of magic and music.

Wood work is something I haven't done recently, but I used to do it a lot and actually created a couple of altars. It's something I'd enjoy doing again, with the proper tools and facilities.

I think applying creativity to your magical work can be a lot of fun. It's a great way to get flexible about your magical work, and challenge yourself to come up with something that's customized to you. If you haven't applied your creativity to your magical work, give it a try and have some fun!

Call for Papers for Disabled Paganism Anthology

E-mail for inquiries and submissions:  tara.miller21 (at) gmail.com; please put “Immanion Press Anthology Submission” in your subject line. Megalithica Books, an imprint of Immanion Press (Stafford, U.K./Portland, OR, U.S.A.) is seeking submissions for a magic anthology from the perspective of practitioners with disabilities or developmental differences. This includes but is not limited to practitioners with mental, cognitive, emotional, physical or sensory impairments and/or practitioners who are part of the Deaf or Blind community.  We have not come up with a title for the anthology yet. That will hopefully present itself through the contributions.

There is much debate about how the words “disabled” and “disabilities”. For the purpose of this publication; however, we'll use the World Health Organization's definition: “Disabilities is an umbrella term, covering impairments, activity limitations, and participation restrictions. An impairment is a problem in body function or structure; an activity limitation is a difficulty encountered by an individual in executing a task or action; while a participation restriction is a problem experienced by an individual in involvement in life situations.”

This anthology is intended to explore magical, occult, and esoteric topics from the view points of practitioners who are disabled or part of the Deaf and Blind community. Equality and access within the magic/Pagan community and society in general are important issues. You can include them as a part of your submission but not the whole. Keep in mind that addressing such topics aren't the sole purpose of this anthology. When thinking about your submission consider what rituals and practices are or have been most beneficial to you. What mystical or magical experiences or knowledge shaped your life for the better? Contributers can be from any magical background or tradition. With all Megalithica publications, the intention with this anthology is to go beyond introductory matters whenever possible.

We are accepting:

essays (academic and personal)

short rituals, prayers, meditations, activities, or spells (not lists of correspondences)

We are especially interested in rituals that take into account limited mobility or immobility, sight impairments, and rituals for the Deaf and blind. Also, some practitioners with disabilities have limited attention spans and would benefit from shorter rituals that include minimal visualization.

Some suggested topics:

Practicing magic in hospitals or other facilities. How can you improvise while complying with facility regulations?

Is the state of the body and mind a reflection of a persons purity or power? Is it a sign of the practitioner working out past wrongs?

Psychological or physical emergencies as shamanic or magical breakthroughs.

Do we choose our bodies and experiences? Do the Gods/Goddesses or Divinity create our bodies or experiences this way for a reason?

Medical symbols and their Pagan history and magical properties. How to enchant and use these symbols.

Gods and Goddesses of Health- such as Asclepius and his daughters. For example: Hygieia whose name is the source of the word hygiene. There is a lot of Pagan history in the medical community.

How to discern spirits, entities and magical experiences when you are dealing with health issues that can impair judgment such as being on pain medication, dealing with mental illness, etc.

How a disability or impairment offers a new perspective on magic practice and theory.

How communing with nature has it's rewards (i.e. ecopsychology or closeness to a specific God(dess) etc.) and challenges (i.e.  mobility issues)

Working magic with companion and/or guide animals or stories about their spiritual significance.

What are some ways to find self-acceptance and empowerment?

Viewing scars from surgery, injury or otherwise as part of your story or “battle scars” or proof of survival.

From the first diagnosis of disease or disability to the loss of a physical function or independence, we feel grief. How can we cope with grief?

Ways to mend the fragmented self i.e. lucid dreaming, soul retrieval, astral travel.

Working with archetypes or mythic images.

These suggestions barely touch the myriad of possibilities. We're interested in any other topics contributors wish to explore. It's your voices that will make this anthology powerful and possible.

Requirements for submission:

Citations for all quoted, paraphrased, or otherwise unoriginal material

Bibliography for works cited

Use the Modern Language Association (MLA) Style http://www.library.cornell.edu/resrch/citmanage/mla

Send the file in Word or RTF format

Do write in your voice! If you’re academically inclined or trained, feel free to be as intelligent and technical as you like. If your work entirely speaks in the first person about your own experience, that is also permissible, but please use a more formal writing style for as much as possible in your piece that is not quoted speech. Unless you do so sparingly, or define your terms (either in the main text or footnotes), DO NOT use lolcat-speak, text message speak, or anything else that could be considered para-English. Our lives are full of abbreviations and “lingo” which we understand but others may not, even people with different disabilities. Please define any “lingo” you use such as Talk Doc (psychotherapist) or P Doc (psychologist) or medical abbreviations.

Rough drafts are due March 01, 2012. These drafts will be edited in a back-and-forth process with the editor. Essays need to be 1500-4000 words, although if your work falls outside those limits, do submit it – we can discuss this during the editing process. Do drop me an email if you are unsure whether your idea fits into the content. We hope to include many voices and the sooner you start the communication process the better.

If your essay is not accepted for the anthology, we will tell you after the first round of edits. All contributors will be provided with a contract upon final acceptance of their essays, not when they are accepted for editing. Compensation will be a free print copy or an e-book of the anthology when it is published and additional copies sold at 40% off the cover price to contributers.

The anthology will be edited by Tara “Masery” Miller. Her blog, the Staff of Asclepius, is featured in the Pagan Portal at Patheos.com. It's for Pagans with mental, physical or sensory impairments; who are in recovery from major injuries or addiction; and/or who are members of the Deaf or Blind community. “It’s a place to share how a spiritual and magical life gives us strength or peace through all of life’s joys and struggles. There are also news updates and interviews with Pagans and experts on various topics affecting the community.”  http://www.patheos.com/community/paganswithdisabilities/  She has Turner Mosaic which created a massive failure of her endocrine system causing many health problems.

Immanion Press is a small independent press based in the United Kingdom. Founded by author Storm Constantine in 2003, it expanded into occult nonfiction in 2004 with the publication of Taylor Ellwood’s Pop Culture Magick. Today, Immanion’s nonfiction line, under the Megalithica Books imprint, has a growing reputation for edgy, experimental texts on primarily intermediate and advanced pagan and occult topics. Find out more at http://www.immanion-press.com.

image and reality

I always find it fascinating to study people considered famous within a given subculture. I wonder what makes them famous, what makes people want to follow after them, what is the glamour that draws them so? And yet I know what it is. It's an ability to create an image that glosses over the reality. That probably sounds cynical, but there's an element of truth to it as well. Do we really know anything about that actor, singer, or author, beyond what the tabloids gossip about or the marketing facade that is built by the person?There's a false kind of intimacy that is created with marketing. We look at pictures of this person, look at how the person portrays this rosy kind of image that is merely a gilded picture, and yet is so captivating because the person has spun a glamour that doesn't even hint at the realities underlying the gilded picture.

I've never really bought into the glamour. Maybe it's because I'm an occult author. Maybe it's because I've actually made it a point to talk with people as myself, instead of trying to trade off on the fact that I've written books. I remember one time a person said to me that he was amazed I'd spend time talking with him, because I was an author. I told him that writing was something I did, but that it didn't define my reality or how I would treat him. That's always been my approach. I don't want people to fall in love with an image, or buy into some presentation. If you want to get to know me, then get to know me for who I am, warts and all.

At the same time, from a magical perspective, there's a lot to be learned from such glamour tactics. Knowing how to present only what you want people to see can be quite useful in job interviews, as well as in other situations that call for a different appearance beyond what is usually present. Of course you run the risk that if people see through it or discover that you weren't authentic, they may feel deceived or betrayed.

There is something to be said for being humble enough to be honest. And there is a strength in that reality, magically and mundanely that goes beyond any glamour that is put together. It's when we can take the mask off, step outside of the illusion that we then discover the reality behind the image.

A broad approach to love magic

I think its best to take a broad approach to love magic. What I mean is, its better to do love magic that isn't focused on getting a specific person, but instead is focused on drawing the right people to your life. And its important to remember that any love magic also needs to focus on self-love. Looking to someone else to fill something in for you won't work. If anything the person you bring into your life into emphasizes the issues you need to work on. That person has their own issues and you will embody those issues, even as that person embodies your issues. Thus the person you bring into your life necessarily will be someone who challenges you in some ways as much as s/he also brings joy and happiness. People have this idea about love, prompted by the concept of falling in love, that its always something wonderful, but while falling in love is a wonderful experience, being in love is necessarily an experience where you truly face your own issues as well as the issues of the other person. The challenge is how you face those issues and evolve past them so that you can truly be with someone, and also so you can truly be with yourself. People go into a relationship hoping their partner will somehow fill in the gaps, somehow solve everything. Little do they realize that your partner isn't a cure-all and if anything s/he will exacerbate the issues because s/he is a mirror that shows you both the wonderful qualities and unpleasant aspects of yourself. Of course you do the same for that person.

Kat and I have, since February, been reading books on relationships and love together. These are typically the books people will turn to when their relationship is in trouble and they are grasping for anything that will save the relationship. I got these books when I was in my previous marriage for that very reason. This time we took a different approach. We decided that we wanted to read these books and talk about the issues that came up as a proactive activity, as something we'd do in order to build a dialogue around love, and allow us to learn more about each other and where we were respectively coming from. And thus far the journey has been very illuminating for both of us. The discussions that have arisen out of what we've read have helped us both look at our respective issues and understand how they contribute to the relationship, as well as what we can do to change those issues.

What I've learned about love magic is that it rarely brings what you think you want, but it always brings what you need. The question is: Are you prepared to accept what you need? For me that preparation has involved doing a lot of internal work, owning my baggage (and letting it go), as well as coming face to face with my desires and understanding where they fit into the entire mix. And I'm still doing this work! It's nothing something where you just get finished, but I can say that taking a proactive approach can make for a much smoother relationship, with both yourself and your partner.

Here's a few books I'd suggest complete with affiliate links

The Passionate Marriage

Undefended Love

Journey of the Heart

Perfect Love, Imperfect Relationships

Love and Awakening

Book Review: Brain Magick (Affiliate Link) by Phil Farber

In Brain Magick, Phil Farber presents a thorough approach to invocation that is a combination of neuroscience and NLP, and is by far one of the best cutting edge books on magic that's available. The author includes lots of exercises the reader can do to test his concepts, and at the same time makes all of his explanations easy to follow. Farber shows you how to bring some woohoo into your life!