Shadow Work Initiatives

Photo by George Becker: https://www.pexels.com/photo/pawn-chess-piece-136351/

One of the projects I'm working on in my life is what I call shadow work initiatives. Shadow work initiatives are opportunities I am taking to explore the shadows within me as it relates to aspects within myself that I feel I need to work on. For example one shadow I've been doing a lot of work has been around my identity as a man. I've recognized how I've lived a nice guy life and I am working on changing that by learning how to communicate what I really want, but also exploring the nice guy in context to the divine masculine.

What I've discovered in this context is how much the nice guy has embodied the shadow in my life. I've bent over backwards for other people, placed my own needs and wants on hold or in suspension, in a way where I wasn't fully conscious of it. Once I started exploring the divine masculine, it forced me to also explore the shadow from a conscious place of awareness, bringing it into the light, where I could see how it played a role in my communication.

My current project around shadow work involves embodying shadow as a mask. I'm going to create a mask of codependency in order to contemplate and understand how codependency has shown up in my life as a mask I've worn both in relationship to other people and to myself. I recognize as well that codependency plays a connective role to my nice guy behaviors, which is important to see, but that its also distinct in relationship to itself.

Inner Alchemy of Life: Physiological Magic pt 1

I discuss my systems of physiological magic and share how I came up with it and provide the basics of how it works in relationship to treating neurotransmitters and hormones like spirits.

The Scythe of Saturn: A consideration of cyclical aspects of Saturnic work

One of the themes of my inner work this year has been around Saturn, in terms of sacred masculinity, but also in terms of space/time magic. I've lately been reading the book Saturn in Transit by Erin Sullivan which explores the astrological influence of Saturn on the transits. One of the more intriguing points she makes is the following:

"The need to castrate our old oppressor in order to install a new order, then swallow out creative issue so as to preserve the status quo, is quite normal in the various stages of development. When we recognize that this is a process, and one, moreso, which repeats itself, we are freed to re-enact this scenario over and over again without reserve. Saturn is the planet that establishes our rites of passage from the one status quo to another and, as that functionary, should be regarded with respect and not with fear and dread. Furthermore, once we recognize that the revolution is originating from within, we are then more capable of conspiring and cooperating with the timing of the events precipitated by the transit."

What I've observed in my own work with Saturn is that there are cyclical aspects of the work that need to recognized in order to get the most out of the work. Once I recognized these cycles and started employing them, I was able to get a lout of the work that I had previously missed out on. So what are the cycles?

The cycle of Fear - Saturn connects us with our fears, because the fears we feel often play a role in the limitations and boundaries we experience. However the real depth of Saturn with fear is that Saturn shows us how we sabotage ourselves with our fears. The mythos of Saturn demonstrates this because of how Saturn sabotages himself with his fear off being overthrown. We can either allow our fears to control us and sabotage our possibilities or we can learn to be present with those fears and discover how to work with them in an intentional way that allows us to liberate ourselves and achieve our potential. Saturn challenges us to do the latter by causing us to experience the former.

Saturnic Wisdom and Inner Alchemy

Working with Saturn involves learning how you have limited and bound yourself and invites you to break free of the self-imposed chains as well as the chains others have put on you so you can evolve and grow. I share my own journey around this in relationship to Saturn.

How to Cultivate Patience in your magical practice

picture copyright Taylor Ellwood 2023

In March, I started attending a Kung Fu school. I had previously been taking Qi Gong classes there but I finally cleared some obligations away and was ready to begin my Kungfu practice. For the last several months I’ve been learning specific techniques at the white belt level that will help me advance to the yellow belt, and today my Sifu determined that I learned them enough to qualify for my first yellow stripe. I appreciate earning that yellow stripe, because I put a lot of effort and exercise into learning the techniques. I can still improve on them, but I have learned the basics.

However the most important lesson I have learned from this process of learning these techniques is patience. I needed to put the time and effort into learning the techniques and I needed to let go of any expectation on when I might advance and instead simply focus on learning the techniques and letting those techniques teach me…not just the movements or the qi, though I learned about those things, but also the virtue that comes in focusing on the practice for the sake of doing it without expecting anything.

I’ve applied this same discipline to my magical work, because as I’ve learned various techniques over the years, what I have always come away with is an appreciation that truly learning those techniques has involved repetition, focus, and dedication. And while I have experimented with various techniques and systems, that experimentation has always occurred after I had already invested substantial time in learning the given system or technique as it is. If you want to learn any practice, in any discipline, you must cultivate patience. And actually that applies to other areas of life as well. But for this article I want to speak to how you cultivate patience for your magical practice.

Common problems with sigil magic

Picture copyright Taylor Ellwood 2023

With any type of magical working there can be challenges that occur which need to be addressed if you’re going to become proficient in that magical working. For this article I’m going to address issues that can occur with sigil magic that may cause your sigils to fail and suggest possible actions you can take to help you improve the efficacy of your sigil magic. Context: When I refer to sigil in this article I’m referring to the chaos magic method of sigil, as opposed to a spirit’s sigil.

I also want to note that with any type of magical working, it can be normal to encounter failures as you learn how to do a given magical working. As with any discipline you learn, it takes time, practice and experiences to develop the expertise and skillset that produces better results. with that said, let’s explore the common problems that can occur with a sigil.

1. You don’t have a well defined statement of desire. The basis of any sigil is the creation of a statement of desire. The statement of desire establishes the intent and defines the desired result, ideally in concrete terms. A well defined statement of desire not only defines the result but also ties up any loose ends. A poorly defined statement of desire leaves room for interpretation and in my experience when there is room for interpretation there is also room for results not manifesting exactly what you want.

For example the statement I want a job is a very broad statement. We can use that statement, but unless we’ve put some thought into the programming of it we are leaving a lot of room for interpretation and that room for interpretation can leave the door open for not getting the result you want or getting one that seems to fit the bill but has aspects you don’t care for.

I treat sigils as programs so when I create a statement of desire. The statement of desire should be the finalized expression of your thought process and include what you want, as well as excluding what you don’t want. When I create a sigil from the statement of desire I put all of that programming into the sigil, in order to define, focus and crystallize the sigil.

Explore related entries in the Library

• Daemonic Sigil Tower Work
• Project Sigil Entity
• Tzaphkiel
• Fotamecus

Scrying Experiment with Crystal Bowl and Candle

Picture courtesy Taylor Ellwood 2023

I recently was fortunate to acquire a crystal bowl/goblet with a stand, which has 3 6 pointed stars in it. It looks fairly esoteric and if it wasn’t used for esoteric purposes before, now it is being used for such purposes. One of the main purposes is for scrying. I’ve used it for scrying on several occasions at this point. On one occasion I used the crystal bowl in an altar for Aphrodite. I poured water and rose petals into it and at some point during the ecstatic dance I walked up and used the bowl to do a scrying session with the goddess.

More recently, during the full moon in Scorpio, I decided to do some scrying with the goetic daemon Decarabia, to help me with identifying what I need to release in my life. I placed the sigil for Decarabia underneath the stand of the bowl, but I found that even though the bowl and stand is crystal, I wasn’t able to see the sigil through the stand. I also had water poured in the bowl, but the water didn’t seem to be part of the problem…There was just too much crystal between the base of the stand and the bowl. This afforded me an opportunity to get creative with how I could connect with the spirit and scry, while still using the crystal bowl.

A sneak peak of Iterative Magic

I talk about Iterative Magic and what it is and give you a sneak peak of my upcoming class iterative magic

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Creating The Beltane altar for Coalessence

Picture courtesy Joanna Brook

Recently I was given the opportunity to create an altar for the Coalessence Ecstatic dance community which has dances every Sunday and Tuesday. It was the Sunday before Beltaine, and on a spur of the moment I decided to volunteer, feeling moved to create an altar. I decided that the theme/focus of the altar would be around Beltaine, and I would dedicate the altar to my patron goddess Aphrodite and patron god Eros.

My approach to creating this altar was also informed by a desire to consider the aesthetics of the deities I was working with as well as the energy I wanted to call into the dance hall. I wanted to make the altar into an art magic working that would call forth the divine power of Aphrodite and Eros and inspire the dancers to celebrate the energies of Beltaine.

I started my process by choosing the items I would bring from my home to the space I was going to be working in. I brought my statues of Aphrodite and Eros, conch shells I had placed on the altar, a bracelet with the inscription of “Live in the Moment,” some crystals in the shapes of hearts, a Lapis Lazuli necklace, a crystal goblet, and roses I recently bought for my beloved, but also as an offering to Aphrodite, since we both work with her.

My ongoing experiments with scrying

I discuss my ongoing experiments with scrying, my upcoming book Scrying the Divine and share how this work is helping me refine my spirit work.

How to work with different currents of natural rhythms

Photo by Drew Rae: https://www.pexels.com/photo/eclipse-digital-wallpaper-580679/

Recently the new moon occurred on the same night as the solar eclipse. When you have two different natural events occur that effect each other, it can bring up some interesting challenges around how to work with those differing natural rhythms in your magical work. On the one hand the new moon is the potential seeding of possibilities and on the other hand, the solar eclipse is the choice to clip away what isn’t working. Of course, another interpretation of the new moon is that of the dark moon when you do shadow work.

I’ve been gradually exploring and experimenting with the natural rhythms of the seasons in relationship to the sun and I’ve also been experimenting with magic on different phases of the moon. I find this work relevant to my space/time magic but also to continuing to develop a deeper relationship with the natural cycles of the world and the astrological currents that can influence this work.

For the most recent confluence of the new moon and a solar eclipse I approached the work with a consideration of how I could factor in multiple currents that could accomplish specific goals for my magical work, while also not doing a separate working for each current. I wanted to do all the work in one ritual, which would still encompass both currents.

The Somatic benefits of martial arts

Photo by Craig Adderley: https://www.pexels.com/photo/photo-a-man-and-woman-doing-martial-arts-1543932/

I recently started learning Kung Fu at a local studio. I had been interested in studying Martial Arts for a long time and had gotten into Qi Gong because of that interest. While I continue to practice Qi Gong and appreciative the meditative and energetic aspects of the practice, I also wanted to branch out to a more martial form in order to better understand the differences, but also see how one practice might comment on the other.

While I definitely have gotten that benefit from starting to study Kung Fu, what I also came to appreciate about Kung Fu were the somatic benefits of the practice. As I learn a given move and enmesh it within my body memory, what stands out to me is how the practice engages me on multiple levels of knowing and consciousness. My body consciousness is engaged when I learn how to step or move a part of my body, but my memory is also engaged, both in learning the move, but also considering how I might have applied it in different situations in my life. My emotional consciousness is also engaged and I am able to work through and release emotions with the practice.

Somatic work has become a kind of buzz phrase of late in the holistic sphere of activities, but somatic studies have been around for a long time, and whenever I learn a new form of body work I look at how I can integrate it into the existing body practices I already practice. For example with Kung Fu, one of the experiences I’ve been paying more attention to is the angle of a movement. I first learned about the angle of a movement by studying the dance disciplines of Laban, who broke movements of the body into the platonic geometric shapes and showed how a given movement could be performed with these geometries in mind.

Fear as an Ally in Your Magical Practice

Fear, in all of its guises, can be a force in our lives that either stops us in our tracks or motivates us to make changes The relationship we cultivate with fear can either turn it into one of our greatest allies or one of your greatest enemies. In this video I explore both aspects.

How to Fuel your Magical Entities and get better results

Picture copyright Taylor Ellwood 2023

Recently I was asked a question about how I fuel magical entities. The person asked if I relied upon deities, elemental or planetary currents or other traditional forms of fueling that are typically used with magical entities. It's a good question to ask, because there are many different ways you can set an entity up, both in terms of how you fuel it, and in terms of other specifications and customizations you can make to the entity.

While I can and do draw on more traditional methods for fueling entities, these methods are only one part of my process for fueling entities (or doing any other kind of magical work that requires a fuel source). The benefit of drawing on more traditional sources is that they are tried and true. For example if you create an entity that's focused around love, it makes sense that you might draw on the Venusian current or seek the aid of a love deity to help you with empowering the entity to perform it's specific tasks.

On the other hand, one might rightfully ask why not just go directly to the source and work with the love deity or the planetary energy without drawing upon an entity for the purposes of doing the spiritual work? Certainly that's a good question to ask as well.

The reason I choose to work with a magical entity is because I can tailor the entity toward the specific needs of the situation, which can be useful, especially if the situation doesn't exactly fit within the domain of a given spirit's influence. Another reason I might create an entity is because I want some distance from the situation, but I still want a magical working to be done, but through a lens that focuses in on my understanding of the situation. A deity or more traditional spirit may not have the exact understanding of the situation that an entity can be programmed to have...and that can be very useful with specific examples.

How I apply self-love as a magical practice

I share how I apply self-love as a magical practice and explain the practical benefits of self love but also share why there needs to be a practical application of self love in order to benefit from the practice.

Deep Cleaning as a form of Release and Healing

Photo by Riya Kumari: https://www.pexels.com/photo/photograph-of-person-sweeping-the-floor-1433350/

Just this past weekend I decided to do a deep cleanse of my house. My roommate was moving out so I was going to need to clean anyway, and it gave me the perfect opportunity to do a physical deep clean of all the rooms of the house and in the process also do a deep clean on the emotional/mental and spiritual levels of the house and myself. I had previously done a deep clean in the fall and this process helped me realize that this should likely be a twice a year event.

I do a lot to keep my house clean normally, but a deep clean is different. With a deep clean what I'm doing is getting everything cleaned on every level. I'm also getting a work around as I move furniture around and so this process becomes a purification on the body level as well.

I also treat a deep clean as a cleansing of emotional and energetic residue that needs to be released. For me, this deep clean was about releasing the residue from 2022 that had been acquired through various experiences I had. Before I started cleaning I called to the spirit of the house and land and asked their blessing for the cleaning. Then I called on patron deities and asked their blessing because I'm cleaning this space as a devotional activity for them as well. Once the blessing is received, the cleaning becomes a work of service to the house and deities, as well as to inhabitants of the house.

Sensory over stimulation and scrying

Image courtesy of Taylor Ellwood 2023

I've been continuing to experiment with scrying using a combination of tools for the purposes of overstimulation. For this particular process I've been working with Andras and Haures, two of the daemons from the Goetia. The initial process has involved setting the sigil for the given daemon up so its between a candle and the black mirror I have set up. I evoke the daemon using the enn for it and then stare at the at the mirror through the candle flame...but set up an optical illusion so that it seems like the candle is doubled in appearance.

I also have been filming these sessions live on instagram and I have the camera propped up so its directed at the flame. The camera creates a halo effect with the flame which can also be used for scrying purposes. I use it as an additional layer of sensory overstimulation. I'm chanting the enn, looking at the candle and mirror and then sometimes scrying via the instagram live video.

Further Scrying Experiments

I took a little break from my scrying experiments because of a weekend trip I took where I did a lot of intense shadow work. I knew I needed to make time to integrate that work back into myself and that doing scrying work on top of that work wasn't a good idea.

But on Saturday night I decided I as ready to start the scrying experiments up again. This time I chose to work with Goetic Daemon Andras, around helping me release and let go of some fear I'd been feeling and to help me also get to the core of that fear.

I chose to evoke Andras via a candle and the black mirror. I also recorded a video of the scrying via Instagram, in part to set up the phone recording as another version of the scrying. What I've noticed is that when I record the scrying, it actually creates an intriguing effect with the candle, where the light of the candle creates a sphere of light in the recording that can also be used for scrying.

How to build energy and intention over time

I discuss how to build intention and energy up over time and what the benefits of doing this can be for magical work as well as other endeavors in your life and why we don't always do this.

How to Integrate Initiatory Experiences in your everyday life

This previous weekend I went away for a weekend retreat where I went through an initiation process. I can't really share any details about what happened there, as its part of a mystery tradition, but what I can share is that I came into the event as one person and came out of the event as a changed and more grounded person.

That is part of the purpose of initiation. We go into an experience, not knowing what will happen and we are changed by that experience in fundamental ways that we may not even fully understand but that nonetheless become part of our rooted being.

Over the years I've had the fortune to attend other events where I've experienced an initiatory change from who I was, wherein I felt a shift in my state of being. This happens any time you remove yourself from mainstream society and immerse yourself in a different environment physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Some experiences may be more intense and driven than others, but all experiences that take us out of the comfort zone will inevitably bring about change.

The question arises though: How do we integrate that change back into our everyday lives?